The approaching Christmas season is enough to strike fear in the hearts of anyone struggling with money. There is such an air of expectation among the children. What parent wants Santa to let them down by not getting them exactly what they want. Who doesn’t want to buy their mother/father/sister/niece the “perfect” gift that will make them squeal with delight? Unfortunately all this costs money.
In my husband’s family we exchange presents with everyone. “Everyone” currently includes: Mom and dad, two sisters, two brothers-in-law, four nieces & nephews, an uncle and the uncle’s significant other. That’s twelve people just on his side of the family. The present push starts on Thanksgiving when we all need to come with a list of what we want so the Black Friday shoppers can get prepared. Christmas morning the living room is a maze of stacked presents. Presents are taken over to my in-laws on Christmas eve so everything can be arranged prior to us arriving. We are given assigned seats and our presents are stacked around our seat. It’s not unusual for the piles to be 2-3 feet high and only a small path to our seats.
The kids absolutely love it. As an adult, it strikes fear in my heart. Fear of the money it takes to buy the presents, fear of the time it takes to shop and wrap all those presents as well as fear of what to do with all the stuff once it’s opened. When our kids were young there were a couple of years that we needed to make two trips to get all of the stuff home.
This may sound like I’m complaining but I’m really not (except for maybe those years it took us two trips to make it home). What I am saying is that it may be a little excessive. With all the hustle and bustle to get ready for Christmas I feel like the reason for Christmas gets forgotten. I think it’s still possible to have a nice Christmas without all the materialistic trappings.
Here are some ideas on cutting down on the work and/or financial strain of gift giving.
- Stop exchanging. This hasn’t necessarily gone over very well when I’ve brought this up in the past (hence the fact that we are still exchanging) but I do think it’s a valid point. If you or someone in your family is truly struggling with finances this would lift the gift giving burden immensely. No one wants to admit to financial struggles so I would encourage anyone who isn’t struggling to be the one to suggest the change. Think of what a relief it would be for your struggling family member to have someone else make the suggestion to change the status quo. We’ve done this with my family and it has actually made the get together more enjoyable.
- Limit gift giving to children under 18
- Exchange names and only buy for the one person each of you have drawn
- Have a white elephant exchange. Go through your house and give away something old or hideous (just make sure it wasn’t the sweater you sister-in-law gave you the year before). Everyone gets to purge an item from their house and open a gift. There will be no emotional attachment to the gift you receive so it will be easy for you to give it away.
- Host a gift grab. Everyone brings one gift (with a $ limit). Everyone draws a number. When it’s your turn you can either “steal” a present from someone else or grab one of the unopened presents
- Have a homemade Christmas. Limit all gift giving to homemade gifts.
- Have a themed Christmas. One year a friend of mine had a “Wisconsin” Christmas. Everything purchased had to be made in or representative of Wisconsin.
- Instead of exchanging gifts put the money towards a get away weekend. Book a condo/house with the extended family for a weekend at the beach, skiing, etc.
- Go on a family excursion. To cut down on the amount of “stuff” and make my shopping a little easier I’ve started giving theater tickets to our local performing arts center. I’m not saving money but I am making my shopping a little easier and not adding to the amount of “stuff” my sister-in-law needs to take home. Last year we had so much fun that my nieces begged me to do it again this year. The best part is I get the tickets at a discount through my employer.
If Christmas is overwhelming for you I would encourage you to sit down, make a list of what is overwhelming and brainstorm how you can solve it. We should be enjoying Christmas and celebrating what it’s really about, not getting stressed and crabby.
How have you cut down on gift giving?
I’ll be linking this up over at Life as Mom